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Post by Tarry on May 9, 2012 15:36:13 GMT -5
Nice to see Jayzero & I reform our Continental Coalition tag team for one night.
We all know Tarry vs. Jayzero would have been the final if it wasn't for that damn, Del Rio!
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Post by Burke on May 16, 2012 11:31:15 GMT -5
No Fatties Allowed Episode 63!                
It’s time for the show your parents don’t want you watching! Yep, it’s No Fatties Allowed time!
The show kicks off with a statement from BP General Manager Sable. She announced that while everything isn’t completely finalized yet, the BP Board of Directors have agreed in principle to host the Tiarnán-Mick Foley Inferno match at Too Hot For TV on May 27. She says though, that if she had her way the match wouldn’t be happening at all and Foley and Tiarnán should be ashamed of themselves for holding the company to ransom. She says the Board will only let the match happen under one condition, however. The condition being that both men sign waivers absolving Beautiful Persons of any responsibility should one or both of them be seriously injured in the match. She says that T has been invited to No Fatties Allowed next week to make all of this official and we will hear from him via satellite later tonight. Cameras cut to what appears to be the boiler room where Mick Foley is rocking back and forward on the floor while burning random objects with a lighter. “11 days Tiarnán, 11 days!” The deranged Foley then picks up and stares at what appears to be his old Mankind mask.
Our opening match of NFA saw the English technical marvel THE Tarrynator battle Alberto Del Rio. Ricardo Rodriguez was at ringside with ADR and interfered numerous times. Just when it looked like the illegal tactics would pay off for the evil duo, Jayzero made his way to ringside and dragged Ricardo by the hair to the back. Capitalising on the distraction, Tarry hit the Tarrydise and got the pinfall on Alberto. Oh, and we think Jayzero just kidnapped Ricardo. Someone should probably call the cops or something.
It’s time for week 2 of the Meanest Girls Invitational Rookiest Diva Contest! The 3 remaining rookies, Maxine, AJ and Kaitlyn, are already waiting in the ring as Tiffany makes her entrance. She wishes Brandon luck tonight in his no. 1 contender match with John Cena and says he’s with them in spirit right now. Tiffany reminds them that being a Meanest Girl is not just a title, it’s a way of life, and urges the remaining rookies to step their game up from last week. She reminds them that someone will be eliminated tonight and then we will be down to the final two. Tonight’s challenge, she excitedly announces, is a dance contest! She says the contest will be judged by crowd reaction and whoever gets the least will be going home tonight. With all that out the way, Tiffany asks for the Meanest Girls music to hit and the contest begins as she makes her way over to the announce table to join JR and King on commentary. Each rookie will have 30 seconds to dance and win the crowd over. Maxine is up first and performs a sexy routine. Tiffany isn’t impressed though. “I’ve seen better from a sleepwalking stripper at 3am. Next!” AJ steps up and delivers a more PG friendly routine that the crowd seems to like. Again, Tiffany isn’t buying it though. “What is she, 9 years old?” Kaitlyn goes last and obviously feels comedy is the way to go as she does a ridiculous robot dance which the crowd loves! “This is embarrassing.” Tiffany throws down her headset and enters the ring. Kaitlyn is unanimously announced as the winner by ring announcer Stacy Keibler, much to the chagrin of Tiffany. Tiffany has to eliminate one of the other two and determines that AJ got the slightly bigger crowd reaction so Maxine is eliminated! A bitter Maxine attacks AJ upon hearing the news and refs have to separate them. Meanwhile, Kaitlyn once again does the robot in celebration as Tiffany shakes her head and goes to the back. AJ and Kaitlyn are the final two in the Meanest Girls Invitational Rookiest Diva Contest!
The Beautiful People, Angelina Love and Velvet Sky, defended their Women’s Tag Team titles against Brie and Nikki Bella up next. TBP were clearly still pissed off at Lacey Von Erich and weren’t in the mood to defend their titles. Following several minutes of action, Velvet appeared to have Brie beat when Lacey’s music hit. Velvet (and Angelina) immediately turned their attention to the entrance way. Brie quickly rolled up the pre-occupied Velvet and the ref counted 3! The Bella Twins are the new Women’s Tag Team Champions! Lacey walks onto the stage and poses with her Women’s title belt. An enraged Angelina and Velvet chase after her and Lacey runs for the hills. Meanwhile, in the ring, Brie and Nikki are overjoyed celebrating their title win. “They look like they’re about ready to make love to those title belts!” and overexcited King suggests.
Up next was a battle between former PROGRESS members as the World Champion Burke faced Brock Lesnar in a non-title match. Rumours state that Sable set this match up because she never got along with the Scot during their prior working relationship. Lesnar made his way to the ring first before Burke walked down the aisle, mic in hand, as usual.
“Some people are actually saying, I’m going to lose to this chump from the UFC
That’s like saying Nikki’s the hottest Bella, when we all know it’s Brie!
Only pussies play in Octagon’s, time for you to step in my ring
Welcome to my world Brock, you can call me the next big thing!
I don’t need to be part of no stable, for my career to thrive
This PROGRESS has been stunted, just like your wife’s sex drive!
People pay to see me wrestle, they watch your shit on a stream
I’mma knock you on your ass, faster than Alastair Overeem!
Doctors are gone have to patch you back up, put you on the operating table
But don’t worry,while you’re away from home, I’ll make sure to come say hello to Sable!”
The mention of his wife’s name causes Brock to snap and jump Burke! The ref calls for the bell to officially start the match as Brock mounts Burke and pounds away on him with right hands. Burke manages to slide over to the ropes and crawls to ringside. Brock dares him to get back in the ring but Burke says he “doesn’t need this” and walks out, getting himself counted-out. The crowd chants “pussy” as Burke screams at the camera how he has a World title match in less than 2 weeks and won’t be competing again until then.
BP Did You Know?! – Last week’s No Fatties Allowed was the most watched show on primetime network TV for the week, beating out Glee, Jersey Shore, Two And A Half Men, South Park and (many!) more.
BP Tag Team Champions The Party Boyz faced the dangerous duo of Edge and Randy Orton, AKA Rated RKO. Zack Ryder appeared to be the weak link of the match as he was overpowered every time he was in the ring and eventually fell victim to Orton’s RKO. Zack and Jason will be relieved that this was non-title tonight. But if the title’s on the line next time, will they put up a better fight against their much more experiences opponents? They’ll have to if they want to hold onto those titles.
Backstage, The Miz ran into the women’s locker room (what a creep) and told Jessica that General Manager Sable had some big news for her and she had to come with him right now. A confused Jessica was clearly suspicious but followed him down the corridor. She walked into the GM’s office looking for Sable but was instead ambushed by the vicious Maryse! Miz laughed at how gullible Jessica was for falling for their trap as Maryse beat away on her. Maryse and Miz had their fun until Daniel Bryan valiantly made the save! Bryan told Miz and Maryse to back off, which they did (although they couldn’t stop laughing on their way out). Bryan helped Jessica to her feet and told her it was time someone finally shut the obnoxious couple up.
In tag-team action, the rivalry between The Rock and World’s Funkiest Man continued when they each chose a partner to go into battle against the other with. WFM of course chose his good friend Mark Henry and they were accompanied by the sexy Funkadactyls, Cameron and Naomi. The Rock, perhaps surprisingly, chose CM Punk. Hey, their tag name should be Punk-Rock! At the conclusion of the match, Rock and Henry were the legal men and brawling at ringside when Henry charged at Rock who rolled out the way, causing Henry to run right into poor Naomi! WFM drops to ringside to check on her as Punk kicks a shocked Henry in the head and throws him into the ring where Rock hits the Rock Bottom and gets the pin. Rock then exits the ring to check on Naomi himself before brutally throwing WFM into the steel steps and picking Naomi up and carrying her to the back as Cameron screams for WFM to get up and help her.
Alberto Del Rio comes to the ring and demands to know what Jayzero has done to his manager Ricardo Rodriguez. Jayzero appears on the titantron from an undisclosed location backstage and reveals Ricardo, tied up on a chair with his mouth also taped shut. Jayzero messes with them for a little before untaping Ricardo’s mouth and giving him a mic. He orders him to say what “we talked about earlier.” Ricardo reluctantly plays along. “Ladies and gentleman, the man who beat Alberto Del Rio for the United States Championship…the greatest United States Champion of all time…Jaaaaaaay-Zeeeeeeeeeero!!!” Jayzero takes the mic from Ricardo and hits him over the head with it before addressing Alberto, “but you…you already knew that!” ADR watches on furiously from the ring.
It’s main event time on No Fatties Allowed as the two winners of last week’s Lethal Lottery tournament, Brandon and John Cena, prepare to go one-on-one. The winner will face Burke for the World Championship in less than 2 weeks at Too Hot For TV. The World Champ himself joins JR and King on commentary for the match. Both men exchange a very sportsmanlike handshake before the match. Once the bell rings though, it’s all business. Brandon immediately goes for the Booty Call but Cena blocks it. He’s clearly scouted his opponent well! Not to be outdone, Brandon reverses an early attempt at the Attitude Adjustment into a DDT for a close near-fall. Both men trade the upper hand for the duration of the match with Burke on commentary repeatedly claiming that he doesn’t care who wins because neither man can measure up to him. Brandon goes for a crossbody off the top rope but Cena rolls through and powers him into the AA! 1…2…Brandon somehow kicks out! JC then goes for the Five Knuckle Shuffle but as he bounces off the ropes Brandon hops up and delivers the Weapon of Ass Destruction! 1…2…Cena’s not done yet though! The crowd is electric with chants of “this is awesome!” as Brandon calls for the Asstastic. He places Cena in the corner and hits it! “Asstastic! Asstastic! Asstastic!” JR exclaims. Brandon plays to the crowd a little before going to pick the lifeless Cena back up but he may have wated too much time as JC, quick as flash, raises him in the air and drives him down with another AA! 1…2…3! Cena wins this hard fought battle! Ring announcer Stacy Keibler announces Cena as the winner as JC helps Brandon to his feet. The crowd show appreciation to both men as they shake hands in the middle of the ring. A disgusted Burke gets up from the announce table and hits the ring looking to blindside his two foes but Cena and Brandon turn around and catch him. With his devious plan foiled, Burke backs out of the ring and up the entrance ramp, promising that he’ll “deal with Cena” at Too Hot For TV. Cena and Brandon once again shake hands and Brandon raises Cena’s hand in victory before they pose for the crowd a little more.
Finally, for the first time since his controversial outburst two weeks ago, we heard from Tiarnán. He was live via satellite from his home and was taking questions from JR. When asked about his contract status, T explained that he has signed a short term contract extension through May 27. He says that if he can’t beat Mick Foley on that night then he doesn’t deserve to be here and you’ll never hear from him again. He explains that he has a new long term 3 year deal already drawn up though and he will sign it if, “or should I say WHEN”, he beats Foley. Under the terms of that deal, he says he would be guaranteed a future BP World title shot and he makes it clear that even in the event of Mick Foley possibly being re-instated to any kind of position of power in BP in the future, he would have no control over T whatsoever. He says that won’t really matter though, because after May 27, making any kind of executive decisions will be the least of Mick Foley’s problems. He calls Foley a hardcore stuntman who has killed wrestling and destroyed lives. T says he is not above stooping to Foley’s level for one night though if it means getting rid of him for good. He promises that on May 27 at Too Hot For TV in their Inferno match, Foley will be made to suffer for his actions. “If you play with fire Mick, you’re going to get burned.” T laughs as JR nervously thanks him for his time and ends the interview before pondering what will happen next week on No Fatties Allowed when both Tiarnán and Mick Foley will be under the same roof just days before their sure to be out of control battle at Too Hot For TV!
Top worldwide trending topics for the night~: “No Fatties Allowed”, “Sable Is Still Hot”, “Tiarnan-Foley”, “Too Hot For TV”, “Inferno Match”, “Mankind”, “Jayzero Took Ricardo”, “Meanest Girls”, “Rookiest Diva”, “Tiffany”, “Dance Contest!”, “Maxine Was Robbed”, “Lacey!”, “Bellas New Champs”, “Brie Really Is Hotter”, “Next Big Thing”, “Sable’s Sex Drive”, “Alastair Overeem”, “Brock Mad”, “Pussy”, “RKO”, “Jason Can Do Better Than Zack”, “It’s A Trap!”, “Miz/Maryse”, “Daniel Bryan”, “Yes!!!”, “Funkadactyls = Ratings”, “Poor Naomi”, “Rocky Sucks”, “Free Ricardo”, “Leave Ricardo Alone”, “Poor Ricardo”, “Jayzero Is A Bully”, “Brandon-Cena”, “Booty Call”, “AA”, “Five Knuckle Shuffle”, “Weapon Of Ass Destruction”, “Asstastic”, “Cena Wins”, “Match Of The Year”, “Tiarnan”, “Bringing It Via Satellite”, “Hardcore Stuntman”, “May 27”. |
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Post by Tarry on May 16, 2012 12:08:57 GMT -5
Highest rated segment of the night, and I only get minimal screentime? I see the NFA Board of Directors are still trying to hold me back.
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Post by Brandon on May 16, 2012 16:31:15 GMT -5
I hope John Cena enjoyed that Asstastic as much as I did.  |
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Post by jayzero42690 on May 16, 2012 16:57:02 GMT -5
But don’t worry,while you’re away from home, I’ll make sure to come say hello to Sable!” You're always after my sloppy seconds. First Kelly, and now Sable. Get your own girl for once. Alberto Del Rio comes to the ring and demands to know what Jayzero has done to his manager Ricardo Rodriguez. Jayzero appears on the titantron from an undisclosed location backstage and reveals Ricardo, tied up on a chair with his mouth also taped shut. Jayzero messes with them for a little before untaping Ricardo’s mouth and giving him a mic. He orders him to say what “we talked about earlier.” Ricardo reluctantly plays along. “Ladies and gentleman, the man who beat Alberto Del Rio for the United States Championship…the greatest United States Champion of all time…Jaaaaaaay-Zeeeeeeeeeero!!!” Jayzero takes the mic from Ricardo and hits him over the head with it before addressing Alberto, “but you…you already knew that!” ADR watches on furiously from the ring. I hope he rolled the R. I love the way I've been fucking with Alberto's head these last few weeks. First I steal his ride and now his announcer. This is the most fun I've had on this show since I was Sable's PA. “Free Ricardo”, “Leave Ricardo Alone”, “Poor Ricardo”, “Jayzero Is A Bully”, lol Twitter always hatin on me. #SuckMyNuts Highest rated segment of the night, and I only get minimal screentime? I see the NFA Board of Directors are still trying to hold me back. It was only the highest rated segment because I was in it  |
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Post by Mutant Couch on May 16, 2012 20:19:15 GMT -5
The Daniel Bryan pairing was inevitable. Jess! Jess! Jess! sounds too much like Yes! Yes! Yes! for it to not have happened. I just hope Maryse and Miz hold him down at some point and shave the beard.
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Post by Tarry on May 17, 2012 9:33:31 GMT -5
It was only the highest rated segment because I was in it But the second segment you were in bombed  If you ever need me to boost the ratings for you, just give me a call. |
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Post by jayzero42690 on May 17, 2012 12:29:38 GMT -5
It was only the highest rated segment because I was in it But the second segment you were in bombed Yeah well the second segment you were in was... oh... oh nvm...  If you ever need me to help you win a match again, don't call. I have alot on my plate. |
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Post by Tarry on May 17, 2012 12:56:26 GMT -5
Fair enough. You've beaten me this time Jayzero, but I'll get you next time.
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Post by Burke on May 23, 2012 8:39:41 GMT -5
No Fatties Allowed Episode 64!                
Just 4 days away from Too Hot For TV live on PPV we bring you another action packed edition of No Fatties Allowed!
The show opens with footage of Tiarnán arriving to the arena. This is the Irishman’s first live appearance in person since his infamous tirade 3 weeks ago. Later tonight he and Mick Foley will be made to sign hold harmless agreements ahead of their Inferno match this Sunday at Too Hot For TV. What will happen when T has a live mic later on this evening?!
Following an announcement that the Party Boyz would defend their Tag Team titles this Sunday against the team of Rated RKO, we were treated to a special preview of that match as Jason went one-on-one with “The Apex Predator” Randy Orton. Zack Ryder and Edge were at ringside, cheering on their respective partners. Jason put up a good fight but eventually fell victim to an out of nowhere RKO! Afterwards as Zack tried to help his partner he was met with a Spear from Edge! Rated RKO have had the Party Boyz’ number in recent weeks. If that trend continues on Sunday we will have new Tag Team Champions!
World’s Funkiest Man walked to the ring and called out the man he will face this Sunday at Too Hot For TV, The Rock. WFM said he’s tired of Rocky messing with his Funkadactyls, Naomi and Cameron. He says Naomi was traumatized over her ordeal with Rock last week and vowed to make “The Great One” pay. Rock makes his entrance and makes light of his recent actions, claiming Cameron and Naomi get wet (with perspiration!) every time they see The Rock, among other crude jokes. The Funkadactyls have heard enough and hit the ring, against WFM’s wishes! They charge at Rocky and wail away on him until WFM tries to calm them down. Rock uses the distraction to his advantage and low blows WFM before delivering the Rock Bottom. Rock then walks to ringside and retrieves a steel chair before re-entering the ring. He is about to crack WFM with the chair when Naomi and Cameron jump on top of the “Funky One”, looking to protect him. Rock laughs and says they are all pathetic. He says he’ll spare WFM for now but smugly vows to end Planet Funk for good on Sunday.
BP Did You Know?! – Last weeks No Fatties Allowed was the most watched episode in the history of the show with over 7.9 Million viewers.
Up next, The Miz, accompanied by his girlfriend Maryse, faced Daniel Bryan, accompanied by Jessica. While tonight is a singles match, on Sunday all 4 will be involved in some mixed tag-team action at Too Hot For TV. Bryan appeared to have the match won when he caught Miz in the Yes! Lock but Maryse distracted the referee who didn’t see Miz tap! This drew the ire of Jessica, who pulled Maryse off the ring apron and threw her into the security barricade. In the ring, Miz stunned Bryan with an eye-rake and dropped him with the Skull Crushing Finale, which was enough for the 3 count. On the outside, Maryse and Jessica continued to brawl as officials struggled to separate them, Eventually, Miz and Bryan themselves had to drag Maryse and Jessica off of each other, much to the crowds chagrin. “Let them fight!” they chanted. They’ll fight this Sunday at Too Hot For TV when Jessica and Daniel Bryan face Maryse and The Miz!
Video footage plays of an incident from this past weekend’s MTV Movie Awards. John Cena and Kelly Kelly were in attendance, representing BP, when Cena was ambushed on the red carpet by BP World Champion Burke! Burke has a chain wrapped around his hand and knocks Cena out with it before delivering an FU right there on the red carpet! Kelly Kelly screams for help as a multitude of C & D list celebrities look on in shock (Screech from Saved by the Bell is spotted fleeing the scene in terror). Security escorts Burke off the premises as a wide eyed Ryan Seacrest (who was interviewing Cena and Kelly for E! prior to the attack) turns to his cameraman and asks “did we get all that on camera??” As Burke is being taken out he is kicking and screaming demanding to know why Cena and Kelly were chosen to represent the company and not him. “I’m the World Champion! I’m a huge movie star! Did no one see 18 Holes?!”
Back live in the arena, John Cena makes his way out and looks ready for business. He says enough is enough and this Sunday it’s finally time he shuts up Burke for good. Cena notes that he has already beaten Burke in the past (earlier this year at Barebacklash) but this time it’s going to be even sweeter, because not only is he going to defeat him, but he’s going to take his World Championship from him also. This brings out Burke, who walks to the ring, mic in hand.
“John Cena’s a phoney, I’m the real rebel
Almost time for me to finish, this little fruity pebble!
I used to look up to you, I was your biggest stan
But now you’re looking at, the REAL Bad, Bad Man!
This is real life son, we’re not playing on the big screen
At Too Hot For TV, he’ll flop harder than The Marine!
Why do you keep making these movies? Did anyone even see Legendary?
I’mma bury his ass so hard, you’ll find him in the cemetery!
I’m a box-office smash, he couldn’t sell out a flea market
I event went to MTV, and beat his ass on the red carpet!
He can’t last with me on Sunday, he’ll never make it 12 Rounds
I’ll be the one walking out, carrying the extra 15 pounds! *Raises World title belt*
Burke steps through the ropes and tries to quickly catch Cena off guard by lifting him up for the FU but Cena slips out and picks Burkie up for the AA! Burke also slips out though and rolls out of the ring as the crowd boo. Cena dares him to get back in the ring but Burke retreats up the ramp and says that on Sunday, his title won’t be going anywhere. Cena tells Burke he has 4 more days with that title and urges everyone to buy Too Hot For TV on PPV because Cena promises that on Sunday, “the Champ will be HERE!”
Backstage, THE Tarrynator is in Sable’s office. He demands a US title shot, claiming his last two matches with Jayzero over the title ended in controversy. The US Champ himself enters and says he’ll take on Tarry anytime, anywhere. “Hold on just a second. I make the rules here.” Sable reminds them. She says Tarry does deserve another title shot but former champion Alberto Del Rio also has a rematch clause. In fact, she says, there are a lot of worthy challengers. Which is why she has signed a 10 man US title scramble match for this Sunday’s Too Hot For TV. The match will feature the US Champion Jayzero, Tarry, Alberto Del Rio, Drew McIntyre, CM Punk, Chris Jericho, Dolph Ziggler, Sin Cara, Cody Rhodes…and her husband Brock Lesnar! She announces that coming up next there will be a special 10 man tag-team match featuring the competitors in Sunday’s match. Following her announcement, Ricardo Rodriguez enters the GM’s office and slaps both Jayzero and Tarry in the face before running for his life! Jay and Tarry are stunned at first before chasing after him down the corridor. He eventually leads them into a dressing room at the other side of the arena where they are ambushed by the steel chair wielding Alberto Del Rio and Drew McIntyre! Alberto and Drew brutally beat on Jay and Tarry with the chairs and leave them unconscious on the dressing room floor. ADR, Drew and Ricardo admire their work before making their way out, ready for their upcoming match.
NFA featured 10 man tag-team action next in a preview of this Sunday’s US title scramble match. With Jayzero and Tarrynator still receiving medical attention in the back they are replaced with Kofi Kingston and AJ Styles. Sable announces that they will be replaced on Sunday also if they are still unable to compete by then. Should that happen, she says, Jayzero would be stripped of the US Championship. The match then begins as we have Alberto, Drew, Brock Lesnar, CM Punk and Chris Jericho vs. Dolph Ziggler (returning to action following the FU through the announce table from Burke 2 weeks ago), Cody Rhodes, Sin Cara, AJ and Kofi. Alberto secures the win for his team when he forces AJ to submit to the cross-arm breaker. Afterwards, Alberto shakes Drew’s hand and congratulates him on pulling off their cunning plan earlier before the evil ADR turns on him and throws him shoulder first into the turnbuckle! He then takes the mic and says that it his “destiny” to regain his United States title on Sunday and nobody will stand in his way.
Women’s Champion Lacey Von Erich is backstage talking to her friend Candice Michelle. She explains to Candice that she has to defend her title in a Beautiful People triple threat match this Sunday at Too Hot For TV against her BP brethren Angelina Love and Velvet Sky. Madison Rayne enters the room and asks Candice if she can have a moment alone with Lacey. Madison says she knows what Lacey’s going through right now because she’s been there herself. Madison tries to give her advice but Lacey stands up and cuts her off. “Shut up. Don’t you dare compare yourself to me. I am NOTHING like you. I know what I have to do. Now get out of my dressing room.” Madison sheepishly exits as Lacey picks up her title belt and looks at it. Following a commercial break, Lacey makes her way to the ring and calls out Velvet and Angelina. TBP twosome don’t take long in granting her request. Angelina asks if Lacey is finally ready to do the right thing. She says if Lacey hands over the title right now they can cancel Sunday’s match and forget that the last month ever happened. Angelina holds out her hand for Lacey to give her the belt. Lacey looks at Angelina, looks down at her title then smacks her over the head with it! A stunned Velvet can’t believe what she just witnessed and enquires “what the hell was that?!” Lacey then knocks her out with the title belt also! The crowd chants Lacey's name as JR goes crazy on commentary. “Lacey Von Erich will not give up! She will not quit! That young woman is walking into Too Hot For TV this Sunday and by Gawd, she’s ready for a fight!”
The next match on NFA was to determine the no. 1 contenders for the BP Women’s Tag Team titles as the Divas of Doom, Beth Phoenix and Natalya, took on Blondetourage, Kelly Kelly and Taryn Terrell. Beth looked to have Kelly beat when she had her up for the Glam Slam but Kelly slipped out, caught Beth off guard and rolled her up for the 3 count! Kelly beat Beth (again)! Following the decisions the Women’s Tag Champs the Bella Twins ran in and laid out Kelly and Taryn with simultaneous Bella Buster’s! GM Sable then appeared on the titantron and announced that this Sunday’s Too Hot For TV PPV special pre-show match would see the Bella’s defend their titles against the new no. 1 contenders, Blondetourage.
Continuing the week long media blitz to promote Sunday’s Too Hot For TV PPV, footage was shown of the Meanest Girls, Brandon and Tiffany, as special guests on last night’s episode of Chelsea Lately on E! Tiffany and Brandon promote the Meanest Girls Invitational Rookiest Diva Contest and promise it will end with a bang on Sunday. Chelsea notes that Brandon is a current Champion which throws him off. “I am?!” Chelsea shows him her notes which say that he is the current BP European Champion. “Oh my God, I totally forgot!” He turns to Tiffany and asks her if she’s seen his title belt anywhere. “Was that that thing you were wearing that one time a few weeks ago? Shouldn’t you like be defending that or something?” “Hell if I know!” Brandon laughs. The most prestigious titles in all of wrestling right here on NFA, folks. Chelsea jokes around with them a little more before thanking them for their time and concludes the interview by plugging Sunday’s PPV one more time.
Which brings us to the Meanest Girls themselves, now live and in person! Tiffany and Brandon make their way out and introduce the finalists in the Meanest Girls Invitational Rookiest Diva Contest, AJ and Kaitlyn! Brandon says that although he’s been busy in recent weeks, he’s reviewed the whole competition to date and has been impressed with them both. He says the most important part is just coming up though. Tiffany then announces that on Sunday, the winner will be determined with a Meanest Girls Bikini Contest! She promises it will be literally Too Hot For TV. Brandon then tells them that they’re not getting tonight off though. He says before Sunday’s final, they will have to take part in one final task. A Diss the Rookie contest! Each rookie diva will be given a minute to trash talk the other and explain why they should win the contest and not their opponent. AJ is up first and playfully mocks Kailtyn a little without going in too hard (they are best friends, remember). Brandon applauds her efforts while Tiffany rolls her eyes. Kaitlyn is next and she also plays fair, having a little fun at AJ’s expense without going too far. Brandon says well done but Tiffany has seen enough. “This is just NOT good enough! Come on! Really? That’s the best you can do?? I’ll show you both how it’s done. Put the clock back up.” Tiffany spends the next minute ripping into both girls. Among other things, she calls Kaitlyn fat and says AJ looks like an anorexic 12 year old boy. Even Brandon thinks she’s gone too far and has to snatch the mic from her to stop her. Tiffany is clearly not happy with either finalist and storms out while Brandon finishes off by reminding us to tune into Too Hot For TV this Sunday where the winner of the first ever Meanest Girls Invitational Rookiest Diva Contest will be crowned! Will it be AJ or Kaitlyn?? Buy the damn PPV to find out!
Finally, General Manager Sable is in the ring where a table is set up for our official contract signing for the Mick Foley-Tiarnán Inferno match this Sunday at Too Hot For TV. She goes over the conditions of the contract which states that Beautiful Persons cannot be held responsible, accountable or liable for any damages incurred by either party as a result of this match. She also notes that should Tiarnán win, he is guaranteed a future BP World title shot and Mick Foley will hold no power over him for as long as he remains under contract. With that out the way, she says it’s time to bring out both men to make this official. First, she introduces Tiarnán. T makes his way to the ring to a mixed response from the sold out crowd on what is his first live appearance on NFA since May 2. Tiarnán grabs the contract from Sable (who judging by her body language, is still bitter about the things T said about her during his infamous outburst 3 weeks ago) and signs it without saying a word. Sable then calls for Mick Foley but Foley is nowhere to be seen. Sable again introduces Foley and finally after a long delay his music hits. Foley emerges wearing his old Mankind mask and attire, carrying a barbed wire baseball bat. He appears to be talking to himself as he slowly walks to the ring swinging the bat. A terrified Sable gets out of there but Tiarnán refuses to budge as Foley enters the ring. They stand face to face in the middle of the ring as the crowd goes crazy with anticipation (“I think business is about to pick up!” – JR). Foley, however, takes a step back, pulls a lighter from his pocket and sets the barbed wire bat on fire! The crowd are in shock as JR and King and other production staff retreat from ringside, fearing for their safety. Foley holds the bat out, motioning for T to take it from him. Tiarnán carefully takes the bat and Foley tells him to hit him with it. T doesn’t know how to react as Foley again commands him, “I said hit me you son of a bitch!” Tiarnán smashes the flaming barbed wire bat across Foley’s skull! T appears emotionless as he slowly puts the bat down and exits the ring. As T walks up the entrance way, Foley crawls to the corner and pulls himself to his feet. He limps to the middle of the ring, rips off his Mankind mask, wipes his bloody face with his hand and signs the contract with his own blood as a sick smile is on his face. Tiarnán looks on in disbelief as Foley then picks the bat back up and begins destroying the table with it. He then exits the ring and begins swinging the bat at the announce table as the show fades to black and one more commercial airs reminding everyone to tune into Too Hot For TV live on PPV…this Sunday!
Top worldwide trending topics for the night~: “No Fatties Allowed”, “Tiarnan”, “RKO”, “Spear”, “Funkadactyls”, “Wet With Perspiration”, “Rock Bottom”, “Jessica-Maryse”, “Catfight!”, “Let Them Fight”, “MTV Awards”, “Cena And Kelly”, “Burke”, “Steel Chain”, “Screech”, “Ryan Seacrest”, “18 Holes”, “Fruity Pebbles”, “Bad, Bad Man”, “The Marine”, “The Champ Will Be Here”, “Tarrynator”, “Jayzero”, “US Title Scramble”, “Run Ricardo!”, “Alberto And Drew”, “Shut Up Madison”, “Lacey!”, “Blondetourage-Bellas On Sunday”, “Meanest Girls”, “Chelsea Lately”, “Brandon Forgot He Was Champion!”, “Rookiest Diva Contest”, “AJ And Kaitlyn”, “Bikini Contest”, “Diss The Rookie”, “She Called Kaitlyn Fat!, “She Went There”, “12 Year Old Boy”, “Tiffany Dropping Pipebombs”, “Sable”, “Tiarnan”, “Mick Foley”, “Mankind”, “Barbed Wire”, “Baseball Bat”, “It’s On Fire”, “Mick Is Sick”, “Inferno Match”, “Too Hot For TV”, “This Sunday”. |
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Post by Tarry on May 23, 2012 9:33:42 GMT -5
That was quite easily one of my favourite overall episodes since we started this. The MTV Movie Awards and Chelsea Lately segments were genius.
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Post by Brandon on May 23, 2012 12:33:21 GMT -5
Chelsea notes that Brandon is a current Champion which throws him off. “I am?!” oop. |
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Post by jayzero42690 on May 23, 2012 18:33:03 GMT -5
Damn that was a long read. What is this a 3-Hour NFA? I'll be there on Sunday. Believe that. Ain't no chair shots gonna hold me down. Alberto, Drew, and even Ricardo, I'm comin' for that ass. And I will walk out of Too Hot for TV still, the longest reigning BP World Champion in history, and still, your BP United States Champion. Ain't no one gonna stop that. Not even you, Tarry. “I’m the World Champion! I’m a huge movie star! Did no one see 18 Holes?!” Wrestling quote of the year. If I was a fan, I'd bring a "Did no one see 18 Holes?!" sign next week, and the gif would be my avatar. “John Cena’s a phoney, I’m the real rebel Almost time for me to finish, this little fruity pebble! I used to look up to you, I was your biggest stan But now you’re looking at, the REAL Bad, Bad Man! This is real life son, we’re not playing on the big screen At Too Hot For TV, he’ll flop harder than The Marine! Why do you keep making these movies? Did anyone even see Legendary? I’mma bury his ass so hard, you’ll find him in the cemetery! I’m a box-office smash, he couldn’t sell out a flea market I event went to MTV, and beat his ass on the red carpet! He can’t last with me on Sunday, he’ll never make it 12 Rounds I’ll be the one walking out, carrying the extra 15 pounds! *Raises World title belt* Ima be honest. You're way better than Cena ever was. and I'm not just kissing your ass so I can keep my title on Sunday |
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Post by Burke on May 24, 2012 11:59:49 GMT -5
BeautifulPersons.Com Official Press Release!
Final card for this Sunday’s Too Hot For TV:
BP World Championship – Burke© vs. John Cena
BP United States Championship Scramble Match – Jayzero© vs. Alberto Del Rio vs. Brock Lesnar vs. Chris Jericho vs. CM Punk vs. Cody Rhodes vs. Dolph Ziggler vs. Drew McIntyre vs. Sin Cara vs. THE Tarrynator
BP Tag Team Championship – The Party Boyz© vs. Rated RKO
BP Women’s Tag Team Championship – The Bella Twins© vs. Blondetourage
BP Women’s Championship – The Beautiful People Explode! - Lacey Von Erich© vs. Angelina Love vs. Velvet Sky
The Rock vs. World’s Funkiest Man
Jessica & Daniel Bryan vs. Maryse & The Miz
Meanest Girls Invitational Rookiest Diva Contest™ Final! – Bikini Contest – AJ vs. Kaitlyn*
Inferno Match – Mick Foley vs. Tiarnán
*Featuring special appearances by Brandon and Tiffany
Live this Sunday only on PPV...it's Too Hot For TV! |
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Post by Tarry on May 24, 2012 12:29:57 GMT -5
Making a space in my trophy cabinet for the BP United States Championship.
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