Funny/Dumb/Etc Wrestling Comments

[Brandon]

How the fuck is Bayley a John Cena? The bitch has been on the MR for all of months. They're rrreeeeeeaching comparing her to the #1 superstar in the company. That really goes to show how fucking grossly high of a pedestal they put these caballos and from what? Their matches on NXT?

The crap Nikki gets like it's all handed to her, and Bayley is seen as the female John Cena and is guaranteed reigns while a bitch wasn't sure if Naomi would ever see one. I can't wait until Carmella gets her ring work together and Alexa, the future face of the division, gets her rhythm and puts these horses (minus charlotte) on their necks and slays with her Enchantress or Circe cosplay at Wrestlemania 35. I'm tired.

[Brandon]

The way Maryse has been serving BUMPS in these backstage skits. Wobbling in her heels at EC and getting wrapped in a curtain tonight

im still not over maryse DRAGGING the curtains down with her as she fell she could've easily fell through the middle slit but QUEEN wanted the dramatics and TUGGED it down with her

Dana & Alicia:

commentary saying "seven years of bad luck" lfj;f;d poor Nattie when the last seven years of her career weren't exactly poppin

[Brandon]

the fact that everyone in this picture besides rock is over

[Brandon]

This UGLY BITCH and her fraudulent white woman ways. Not only did she ATTEMPT MURDER on Candice and McCool but she deliberately ruined Alicia Fox's 2011 push to serve her own laziness. Her send-off was not even televised, that's how unimportant this behemoth was. What the fuck is her career?? She got carried through her biggest feuds by Mickie and Melina and after that was over and none cared for this bitch, WWE had to get Rosa Mendes to rejuvenate her career

Then she made her feud with LayCool EXTREMELY difficult (by McCool's admission, Beth rejected a lot of the ideas that were thrown around about the feud which prompted many passive aggressive remarks in McCool's interview about Mickie James where Mickie was game for everything, and she didn't have to worry about ideas being turned down). Most of what follows is a blur, but I do remember this ugly bitch ROBBING Natalya of her moment (another thing McCool made a comment about, which, thank God someone else noticed this bitch and her wicked ways) and her idle title reign which consisted of 2 minute matches on RAW, her faking an injury twice before losing it to Nikki Bella.

I hope this bitch trips on her way to give a self-serving speech about how she was the greatest when her career highlight is being Santino Marella's sidepiece. Goodbye!

[Burke]

Do you think Roman gets friction burn from all the rubs he gets

[Mutant Couch]

Mar 6, 2017 15:10:57 GMT -5 Burke said:

Do you think Roman gets friction burn from all the rubs he gets

Video plz.

[Burke]

SPOILER: Click to show

Michelle McCool and Taker look like if Daenerys and Khal Drogo stayed together into old age.

[Mutant Couch]

Stephanie looks like a bird.

[Jayzero]

I thought Michelle was Linda for a second, no shade

[Jayzero]

Nikki Bella right now on SmackDown

[Burke]

She should have left all that in the ring like Taker did.

[Mutant Couch]

I didn't know where to put this.



I'm not sure what's worse that someone impersonates Sunny or that it is obviously fake, because of how coherent it is.

[Brandon]

That lead me to her real Facebook account, and it sounds like this bitch is living in a halfway house.

[Mutant Couch]

Ew. She really might be the worst person alive in wrestling.

"Some people never cease to amaze me. This Muslim fucktard that was in rehab last year with me, messaged me with some pretty explicit sexual stuff, and asked for a hook up. When I rejected him, he proceeded to rant on me with nasty comments about how I think I'm too good for him, cursing me out, etc. YEAH YOU MUSLIM FUCK! I AM TOO GOOD FOR YOU, AND SO IS THIS COUNTRY YOU'RE LIVING IN! Go back to your homeland and get shot in the face, you ignorant, arrogant Islamic bastard! We don't want you here! There. I feel better now"

[Brandon]

A Maria stan asked how people would book her and Mike Bennet on SmackDown and the responses killed me:

I would book her as her husband's manager, in a fantasy league maybe.

I wouldn't.

A round trip.

She would make her return in front of Shane's door, begging and crying for a contract.

I'd book her in charge of catering food backstage

I'd close the book.

In beginners classes at the performance center.

In a dumpster match against Braun, though instead of getting thrown off the stage, have ha thrown back to Impact.