2015 BP Rumble Match

[Burke]

Rules:

SPOILER: Click to show

1. You can’t eliminate yourself.
2. You can’t make yourself eliminate someone.
3. Only one elimination per post.
4. After you post you have to wait for someone else to go before you can post again.

The 15 men and women competing will be:

SPOILER: Click to show

1. Angelwings
2. Astrozombie
3. BFizzle
4. BigFaker
5. Burke
6. Emerald
7. Jayzero
8. Malfunkshun
9. Mutant Couch
10. Tarry
11. Tiarnán
12. Wolfgang
13. x1988
14. Zack Ryder
15. Zino

Now…



The bell rings and the Rumble begins. Zack Ryder charges at Astrozombie with reckless abandon in the opening seconds of the match. Astro simply steps aside and Zack, unable to stop his momentum, goes flying over the top rope and both feet hit the floor. We have our first elimination.

Remaining Participants:

Angelwings
Astrozombie
BFizzle
BigFaker
Burke
Emerald
Jayzero
Malfunkshun
Mutant Couch
Tarry
Tiarnán
Wolfgang
x1988
Zack Ryder
Zino

[Brandon]

The bell rings and the Rumble begins. Zack Ryder charges at Astrozombie with reckless abandon in the opening seconds of the match. Astro simply steps aside and Zack, unable to stop his momentum, goes flying over the top rope and both feet hit the floor. We have our first elimination.

Across the ring, x1988 yolks Burke up by the throat. He lifts him over his head and attempts to throw him to the outside, but Malfunkshun low blows him, and together the other participants, except for BFizzle, who stands back and checks his nails (since I can't make myself eliminate someone), work together to throw him over the top rope to the outside.

Remaining Participants:

Angelwings
Astrozombie
BFizzle
BigFaker
Burke
Emerald
Jayzero
Malfunkshun
Mutant Couch
Tarry
Tiarnán
Wolfgang
x1988
Zack Ryder
Zino

[Astrozombie]

The bell rings and the Rumble begins. Zack Ryder charges at Astrozombie with reckless abandon in the opening seconds of the match. Astro simply steps aside and Zack, unable to stop his momentum, goes flying over the top rope and both feet hit the floor. We have our first elimination.

Across the ring, x1988 yolks Burke up by the throat. He lifts him over his head and attempts to throw him to the outside, but Malfunkshun low blows him, and together the other participants, except for BFizzle, who stands back and checks his nails (since I can't make myself eliminate someone), work together to throw him over the top rope to the outside.

Emerald charged towards the ring and Wolfgang immediately hits him with a thez press. With impressive strength, Emerald threw Wolfgang off and both men jumped to their feet. Already having him scouted, Emerald tossed him into the turnbuckle and ran towards him, hitting Wolfgang with a clothesline, causing him to fall to his ass. BFizzle's eyes widened at the opportunity, quickly he ran in front of Emerald, motioning for him to stop. Due to their brief alliance in the past, Emerald nodded, letting him take on the BP's newest Australian superstar. Pulling his trunks up, B spanked his exposed ass cheeks and rammed it right into Wolfgang's face. The crowd cheered at his signature stink face. MC was infuriated at the sight that lay before her eyes. Stomping towards the blonde boy, the two started to bicker, whilst him still in the middle of giving the stinkface. On the other side of the ring, Emerald watched confused and Burke saw his chance. Hitting him in the gut with a kick, Emerald keeled over. Somehow Burke was strong enough to pull him on his shoulders and walk to the ropes. John Cena stood on the outside, screaming for Burke in slutty valentines day' lingerie and screamed even louder as Burke hit the FU on Emerald, throwing him over the ropes!


Remaining Participants:

Angelwings
Astrozombie
BFizzle
BigFaker
Burke
Emerald
Jayzero
Malfunkshun
Mutant Couch
Tarry
Tiarnán
Wolfgang
x1988
Zack Ryder
Zino

[Brandon]

[Burke]

The bell rings and the Rumble begins. Zack Ryder charges at Astrozombie with reckless abandon in the opening seconds of the match. Astro simply steps aside and Zack, unable to stop his momentum, goes flying over the top rope and both feet hit the floor. We have our first elimination.

Across the ring, x1988 yolks Burke up by the throat. He lifts him over his head and attempts to throw him to the outside, but Malfunkshun low blows him, and together the other participants, except for BFizzle, who stands back and checks his nails (since I can't make myself eliminate someone), work together to throw him over the top rope to the outside.

Emerald charged towards the ring and Wolfgang immediately hits him with a thez press. With impressive strength, Emerald threw Wolfgang off and both men jumped to their feet. Already having him scouted, Emerald tossed him into the turnbuckle and ran towards him, hitting Wolfgang with a clothesline, causing him to fall to his ass. BFizzle's eyes widened at the opportunity, quickly he ran in front of Emerald, motioning for him to stop. Due to their brief alliance in the past, Emerald nodded, letting him take on the BP's newest Australian superstar. Pulling his trunks up, B spanked his exposed ass cheeks and rammed it right into Wolfgang's face. The crowd cheered at his signature stink face. MC was infuriated at the sight that lay before her eyes. Stomping towards the blonde boy, the two started to bicker, whilst him still in the middle of giving the stinkface. On the other side of the ring, Emerald watched confused and Burke saw his chance. Hitting him in the gut with a kick, Emerald keeled over. Somehow Burke was strong enough to pull him on his shoulders and walk to the ropes. John Cena stood on the outside, screaming for Burke in slutty valentines day' lingerie and screamed even louder as Burke hit the FU on Emerald, throwing him over the ropes!

Burke is dazed after his exploits and realises that the image of Cena cheering him on was all in his head. "No John, come back!" He is attacked from behind by BFizzle before his mental breakdown can go any further. In an unusual turn of events, BigFaker calls for a timeout (in the middle of a Rumble match?!). “What the hell is going on here?”, he enquires. “I don’t even remember how I ended up in this ring.” The other competitors look around at each other, confused as to what to do. Eventually, Jayzero says fuck this, kicks Faker in the balls and throws him over the top rope. This springs everyone else back into action and the Rumble continues.


Remaining Participants:

Angelwings
Astrozombie
BFizzle
BigFaker
Burke
Emerald
Jayzero
Malfunkshun
Mutant Couch
Tarry
Tiarnán
Wolfgang
x1988
Zack Ryder
Zino

[Brandon]

The bell rings and the Rumble begins. Zack Ryder charges at Astrozombie with reckless abandon in the opening seconds of the match. Astro simply steps aside and Zack, unable to stop his momentum, goes flying over the top rope and both feet hit the floor. We have our first elimination.

Across the ring, x1988 yolks Burke up by the throat. He lifts him over his head and attempts to throw him to the outside, but Malfunkshun low blows him, and together the other participants, except for BFizzle, who stands back and checks his nails (since I can't make myself eliminate someone), work together to throw him over the top rope to the outside.

Emerald charged towards the ring and Wolfgang immediately hits him with a thez press. With impressive strength, Emerald threw Wolfgang off and both men jumped to their feet. Already having him scouted, Emerald tossed him into the turnbuckle and ran towards him, hitting Wolfgang with a clothesline, causing him to fall to his ass. BFizzle's eyes widened at the opportunity, quickly he ran in front of Emerald, motioning for him to stop. Due to their brief alliance in the past, Emerald nodded, letting him take on the BP's newest Australian superstar. Pulling his trunks up, B spanked his exposed ass cheeks and rammed it right into Wolfgang's face. The crowd cheered at his signature stink face. MC was infuriated at the sight that lay before her eyes. Stomping towards the blonde boy, the two started to bicker, whilst him still in the middle of giving the stinkface. On the other side of the ring, Emerald watched confused and Burke saw his chance. Hitting him in the gut with a kick, Emerald keeled over. Somehow Burke was strong enough to pull him on his shoulders and walk to the ropes. John Cena stood on the outside, screaming for Burke in slutty valentines day' lingerie and screamed even louder as Burke hit the FU on Emerald, throwing him over the ropes!

Burke is dazed after his exploits and realises that the image of Cena cheering him on was all in his head. "No John, come back!" He is attacked from behind by BFizzle before his mental breakdown can go any further. In an unusual turn of events, BigFaker calls for a timeout (in the middle of a Rumble match?!). “What the hell is going on here?”, he enquires. “I don’t even remember how I ended up in this ring.” The other competitors look around at each other, confused as to what to do. Eventually, Jayzero says fuck this, kicks Faker in the balls and throws him over the top rope. This springs everyone else back into action and the Rumble continues.

While the remaining participants spread out brawling in five pairs of two, Zino is the odd man out, and tries to stay out of the way. Nearby, Astro scoops a still wedgie-fied BFizzle into the air and slams him to the mat near Zino's feet. Zino tries to back away, afraid of being caught in the crosshairs, and inadvertently falls through the ropes to the floor. Zino has been eliminated.


Remaining Participants:

Angelwings
Astrozombie
BFizzle
BigFaker
Burke
Emerald
Jayzero
Malfunkshun
Mutant Couch
Tarry
Tiarnán
Wolfgang
x1988
Zack Ryder
Zino

[Burke]

The bell rings and the Rumble begins. Zack Ryder charges at Astrozombie with reckless abandon in the opening seconds of the match. Astro simply steps aside and Zack, unable to stop his momentum, goes flying over the top rope and both feet hit the floor. We have our first elimination.

Across the ring, x1988 yolks Burke up by the throat. He lifts him over his head and attempts to throw him to the outside, but Malfunkshun low blows him, and together the other participants, except for BFizzle, who stands back and checks his nails (since I can't make myself eliminate someone), work together to throw him over the top rope to the outside.

Emerald charged towards the ring and Wolfgang immediately hits him with a thez press. With impressive strength, Emerald threw Wolfgang off and both men jumped to their feet. Already having him scouted, Emerald tossed him into the turnbuckle and ran towards him, hitting Wolfgang with a clothesline, causing him to fall to his ass. BFizzle's eyes widened at the opportunity, quickly he ran in front of Emerald, motioning for him to stop. Due to their brief alliance in the past, Emerald nodded, letting him take on the BP's newest Australian superstar. Pulling his trunks up, B spanked his exposed ass cheeks and rammed it right into Wolfgang's face. The crowd cheered at his signature stink face. MC was infuriated at the sight that lay before her eyes. Stomping towards the blonde boy, the two started to bicker, whilst him still in the middle of giving the stinkface. On the other side of the ring, Emerald watched confused and Burke saw his chance. Hitting him in the gut with a kick, Emerald keeled over. Somehow Burke was strong enough to pull him on his shoulders and walk to the ropes. John Cena stood on the outside, screaming for Burke in slutty valentines day' lingerie and screamed even louder as Burke hit the FU on Emerald, throwing him over the ropes!

Burke is dazed after his exploits and realises that the image of Cena cheering him on was all in his head. "No John, come back!" He is attacked from behind by BFizzle before his mental breakdown can go any further. In an unusual turn of events, BigFaker calls for a timeout (in the middle of a Rumble match?!). “What the hell is going on here?”, he enquires. “I don’t even remember how I ended up in this ring.” The other competitors look around at each other, confused as to what to do. Eventually, Jayzero says fuck this, kicks Faker in the balls and throws him over the top rope. This springs everyone else back into action and the Rumble continues.

While the remaining participants spread out brawling in five pairs of two, Zino is the odd man out, and tries to stay out of the way. Nearby, Astro scoops a still wedgie-fied BFizzle into the air and slams him to the mat near Zino's feet. Zino tries to back away, afraid of being caught in the crosshairs, and inadvertently falls through the ropes to the floor. Zino has been eliminated.

BFizzle and Malfunkshun double team Tiarnán in one corner as Burke and Jayzero pretend fight in the other in a dubious attempt to conserve energy. They’ve always been master strategists. Meanwhile, Wolfgang and Angelwings are battling by the ropes. With their attention on each other, they fail to notice Tarry sneak up behind them and push them over the top rope. Angelwings has been eliminated but wait, Wolfgang is still hanging on! He is dangling precariously but only one of his feet touch the floor. He skins the cat and re-enters the ring before delivering a huge clothesline to a stunned Tarry before collapsing in exhaustion.

Remaining Participants:

Angelwings
Astrozombie
BFizzle
BigFaker
Burke
Emerald
Jayzero
Malfunkshun
Mutant Couch
Tarry
Tiarnán
Wolfgang
x1988
Zack Ryder
Zino

[Brandon]

Damn near two years later.


The bell rings and the Rumble begins. Zack Ryder charges at Astrozombie with reckless abandon in the opening seconds of the match. Astro simply steps aside and Zack, unable to stop his momentum, goes flying over the top rope and both feet hit the floor. We have our first elimination.

Across the ring, x1988 yolks Burke up by the throat. He lifts him over his head and attempts to throw him to the outside, but Malfunkshun low blows him, and together the other participants, except for BFizzle, who stands back and checks his nails (since I can't make myself eliminate someone), work together to throw him over the top rope to the outside.

Emerald charged towards the ring and Wolfgang immediately hits him with a thez press. With impressive strength, Emerald threw Wolfgang off and both men jumped to their feet. Already having him scouted, Emerald tossed him into the turnbuckle and ran towards him, hitting Wolfgang with a clothesline, causing him to fall to his ass. BFizzle's eyes widened at the opportunity, quickly he ran in front of Emerald, motioning for him to stop. Due to their brief alliance in the past, Emerald nodded, letting him take on the BP's newest Australian superstar. Pulling his trunks up, B spanked his exposed ass cheeks and rammed it right into Wolfgang's face. The crowd cheered at his signature stink face. MC was infuriated at the sight that lay before her eyes. Stomping towards the blonde boy, the two started to bicker, whilst him still in the middle of giving the stinkface. On the other side of the ring, Emerald watched confused and Burke saw his chance. Hitting him in the gut with a kick, Emerald keeled over. Somehow Burke was strong enough to pull him on his shoulders and walk to the ropes. John Cena stood on the outside, screaming for Burke in slutty valentines day' lingerie and screamed even louder as Burke hit the FU on Emerald, throwing him over the ropes!

Burke is dazed after his exploits and realises that the image of Cena cheering him on was all in his head. "No John, come back!" He is attacked from behind by BFizzle before his mental breakdown can go any further. In an unusual turn of events, BigFaker calls for a timeout (in the middle of a Rumble match?!). “What the hell is going on here?”, he enquires. “I don’t even remember how I ended up in this ring.” The other competitors look around at each other, confused as to what to do. Eventually, Jayzero says fuck this, kicks Faker in the balls and throws him over the top rope. This springs everyone else back into action and the Rumble continues.

While the remaining participants spread out brawling in five pairs of two, Zino is the odd man out, and tries to stay out of the way. Nearby, Astro scoops a still wedgie-fied BFizzle into the air and slams him to the mat near Zino's feet. Zino tries to back away, afraid of being caught in the crosshairs, and inadvertently falls through the ropes to the floor. Zino has been eliminated.

BFizzle and Malfunkshun double team Tiarnán in one corner as Burke and Jayzero pretend fight in the other in a dubious attempt to conserve energy. They’ve always been master strategists. Meanwhile, Wolfgang and Angelwings are battling by the ropes. With their attention on each other, they fail to notice Tarry sneak up behind them and push them over the top rope. Angelwings has been eliminated but wait, Wolfgang is still hanging on! He is dangling precariously but only one of his feet touch the floor. He skins the cat and re-enters the ring before delivering a huge clothesline to a stunned Tarry before collapsing in exhaustion.

Malfunkshun and Mutant Couch approach one another in the center of the ring, and Malfunkshun greets Mutant Couch with a slap across the face. Mutant Couch rears back and slaps Malfunkshun even harder, causing the audience to gasp. Malfunkshun sells the slap, but then spins around and slaps Mutant Couch even harder! Then Mutant Couch slaps Malfunkshun even harder than that! The audience cheers as Mutant Couch tackles her and the two catfight in the middle of the ring, while BFizzle fends off both Burke and Jayzero. BFizzle delivers a forearm to Burke, but Jayzero kicks him in the stomach and they knock him to the ground. The two share a high five in celebration, but as soon as Jayzero turns him back on Burke, Burke grabs him from behind and tosses him over the top rope! Jayzero throws a fit on the outside and Burke shrugs, turning back to the action inside.

Remaining Participants:

Angelwings
Astrozombie
BFizzle
BigFaker
Burke
Emerald
Jayzero
Malfunkshun
Mutant Couch
Tarry
Tiarnán
Wolfgang
x1988
Zack Ryder
Zino