Friday the 13th: The Game

[Brandon]

Glitchers are annoying but so are the dead bitches who rat out survivors because they don't wanna spectate.

You should have filmed it and sent it to the developers so the glitchers would be banned.

Also if you used your mic like I keep telling you to, you could have told them that you were going to do such a thing if they didn't come out. But instead I'm sure you're just sat there in silence, so I don't feel sorry for you.

You got cucked, ho.

[Astrozombie]

B and I had to fight through a few rough lobbies, but it was worth it in the end because we got to meet/add a cool player. But honestly at this rate we'll have enough people for a lobby and we don't gotta worry about asshole 12 year olds playing or glitchers. So tonight wasn't totally in vain.

[Brandon]

Good Lord, tonight was a shit show. Astro and I played so many rounds where no one was using a mic and nothing was getting done, but then we were spectating and the last person alive was a Tiffany, and she was standing on this huge rock, and I was like, how tf did she even get up there? When Jason finally showed up and couldn't get to her, I realized that she had glitched the map and was doing the same thing Burke was talking about earlier, because she then ran into the lake and was on the outside of the buoys. There were like 8 minutes left in the match and I sent them a message that I was recording, and this and more transpired:

TinyPic is being a bitch so it wont upload screenshots of the whole conversation, but we basically went back and forth with them just telling me over and over again that they don't care if they get banned, and I was like, cool, then it wont be a problem when I see to it that you are.



Then we jumped to the opposite end of the spectrum where these four annoying nerds jumped into the lobby and would not shut the fuck up. But this is what you have to watch out for when a party joins the lobby together, because these bitches were cheating. I had gotten all of the parts to the four seater and died, and that was fine, but then I told Astro that the four seater was good to go and he gets over there. He doesn't even TOUCH any of the parts yet, and Jason was in the middle of going after a Buggzy (one of his friends), and all of a sudden, he stops, teleports to the four seater, and kills Astro. That was suspicious, but then in the next round Astro and I found the parts to the two seater and he got them in, no problem with AJ, and then before he can even crank the car, which is what alerts Jason, again, Jason teleports right to us and he kills us both. When we got in the spectator chat I straight up asked Jason's friends, "How did he know we were at the car? We hadn't even cranked it yet."



Two of them muttered that they didn't know at the same time and then the main one of them was like, "He just had a sixth sense." lol what so bad about that is he wasn't even saying it sarcastically, which I might have respected, but he really said it like we were dumb enough to believe that shit lol. But I was the host so after that game I ended that lobby and kicked them and started another, and everything was going reallllly well for us finally because we had a couple of good players with mics and we were all having a gay old time, but after a couple of people left, there were more muthafuckin cheaters. First, this guy was Jason and literally ran AROUND the two seater when these two players were escaping to go after an AJ, and then didn't try to stop them even after he'd killed her. Then in the last round I just did, that same guy was Jason again and the two people he let get away earlier had gotten the four seater up and running. I jump in the backseat... and they don't go anywhere. Jason morphs to us, pulls me out, and they start driving. Again, he doesn't try to stop them after he's killed me, and they get away. The other guy I was playing with was hiding in a spot near the lodge, and he said when you hide in this particular spot it's supposed to make the lodge glow red so Jason thinks you're inside, even though you're outside, but yet, Jason once again came around to where he was and was looking around like he was trying to find him but couldn't, because he was standing around a corner. Jason went away, came back a second later, and found him this time. Oh my God it was so annoying, I wanted to end the match but I didn't wanna screw that guy outta his XP, but luckily it didn't last much longer anyway and I'd had more than enough fuckery for one night and just ended the lobby.

The lobby truly makes or breaks the game, tbh.

[Brandon]

This dude's driving skills were insane. And Jason was so consumed with stopping us that everyone else got away. 🤣

[Brandon]

This song is a bop.

[Astrozombie]

Oh my god tonight started off so rough playing this game, but I'm glad I stuck around because the lobby B and I were in was by far the best group of players I've ever played with. Minus the 12 year old. But I do want to talk about my moment of glory. The most annoying thing about this game are the cheaters. Like whether they're glitching outside of the map or a counselor is helping out Jason. Tonight we had a guy playing as Vanessa and what he'd do was he'd either attack you or make noise to lead Jason straight to you. Hence how I died. But payback is a bitch, I came back as Tommy and hunted Vanessa down and shot him. I only got 1EXP for that round, but it was worth it.

I cannot stress the cool people you meet playing this game though. We had a girl under the gamer tag of 'luscious labia' and hearing B shouting across the map "Hey labia!" Killed me. We also had an annoying 12 year old who started off cool, but then got progressively more annoying the later it got. At the end of the night, he was tryna add everyone he played with so a bitch got outta that lobby real quick.

[Brandon]

Honestly, I'm glad that kid was in there because he was great roast fodder and all of our labia jokes were flying over his head.

Holy shit though, all of you guys jumped off at once and the next round was already starting and since I was the host I didn't wanna kick everyone, so I said this would be my last round, but I should have gotten out when I had the chance. I was running around and all the cabins had already been looted, but nothing had been done, and then I ran across an AJ with the propeller who was running towards the boat. I follow her, and by the time I catch up she's cranking up the boat and no one else is around, so I start to get in, when these two other people run up and one of them is bitching about how he put the gas in and he hopes Jason kills us, etc. I was like, it's cool, you can have your seat. So I get out, but the other dude who ran over with him gets in. Well, they leave in the boat, but apparently Jason stopped them, and I'm back to running around with my thumb up my ass. I notice that the boat is out in the middle of the lake and the two people who tried to leave in it are dead, and then that annoying kid and the guy who was bitching about the boat had found the fuse and were running towards the house, and my choices were to either stick with them or risk swimming out to the lake, and I decided I'd rather die than work with either of them, but I actually made it to the boat and managed to escape. Well, as soon as I did, it put me in the spectator chat and that guy was in the middle of saying I was a piece of shit for taking the boat lol. I asked him why and he said because I didn't contribute to it, and I told him I tried to give him his seat but the other guy took it, but he was still complaining because they died trying to get the fuse to the house and I got away on "his" boat. I told him it wasn't that serious and he was like, it really is though, and I said it's REALLY not. Then he called me selfish and I was like, well you sound like an asshole, and that was that, because he went silent. UNTIL he started chastising the kid and blaming him for them dying, and I was like dude, people die, get over it, that's the whole point of the game, and we went at it some more and then I just started rubbing in the fact that he died and I got away on the boat and he was like, I don't care about that anymore, and I was like CLEARLY you do, and then he started talking about fairness and blah blah blah and at this point it was just NOT worth it to me and I was like well since you hate this round so much... *ends lobby, drops mic.*

And I still got away in your boat. Dead bitch.

[Brandon]

But tonight really was such a great lobby before that. I'm just pissed I had to end on that note. Though I shouldn't be, because I got the last laugh - in multiple ways.

I now only ever wanna play with you, Phrog, Labia and Wraith.

[Astrozombie]

[Brandon]

Astro is in no hurry to tell you all about his knight in shining armor, OLDDADDY08, I see...

[Astrozombie]

The man got us outta there from a murderous 12 year old, I aint complainin

[Brandon]

Aug 10, 2017 14:07:29 GMT -5 Astrozombie said:

The man got us outta there from a murderous 12 year old, I aint complainin

lol it was this guy's first round with us and when he popped up in the lobby we were all playfully laughing about his name and how creepy it sounded, and I said it sounded like the title of a raunchy comedy. Fast forward to halfway into the round and I asked what happened to Astro, and they told me he escaped in the boat with Old Daddy. I was like, "Ewwww!" and we were all laughing. Sugar baby ass.

[Brandon]

Aug 6, 2017 14:19:22 GMT -5 Brandon said:

Burke, start maining Chad so I can whine his name throughout the match like Chanel.

Never mind, you're no longer needed.



Astro was Jason, btw.

[Brandon]

So there's this really obnoxious child who found his way into our F13 squad, and he LOVES being Jason and it's so creepy whenever he is, because he does this weird Goofy chuckle whenever he kills you. One time I re-spawned as Tommy and he teleported RIGHT to me and spawn trapped me and killed me immediately and it made me so mad. Anyways, he was Jason twice last night and I escaped him both times.



In this particular round, I spawned by the phone, which he immediately teleported to, of course as I was crawling out of a window. I was like, "Come on, I don't even have a weapon yet." and he was like, "That's too bad, huh?" This child got tunnel vision for me and I house hopped all the way across the map with him in pursuit, unintentionally leading him to the car, where luckily they were in the middle of starting it lol. But anyways, like I said, when the match started I didn't even have a weapon yet and he didn't care, so when I grabbed the bat in the small cabin and stunned him outside the lodge, I was like, "I got a weapon now, bitch!"



And even though Astro missed with the shotgun, he was gracious enough to die immediately after, still providing the distraction that allowed us to make our escape.

[Burke]

I finally saw Jason die. I only contributed one baseball bat shot and two other people did most of the damage but I'll still take more than my fair share of the credit.