BP EWR Month 8

[Burke]

Some BP related roster news before T’s first show tomorrow:

Joey Mercury has a ripped bicep and is out for 7 months.

Doug Williams is retiring at the end of October.

Scott Steiner was unhappy and refused to sign a new contract so he’s no longer a member of the roster.

Goldust is unhappy and wants to leave. Chris Jericho, Billy Gunn, Desmond Wolfe, D’Angelo Dinero and Wade Barrett are all at under 40% morale too. All of us are happy though (and that’s really all that matters tbh).

Vince McMahon retired from WWE. I hired him as a road agent for us. Our biggest competitors Chairman is now a little BP road agent! How the mighty have fallen.

[Tarry]

Sept 27, 2011 16:05:33 GMT -5 Burke said:

Doug Williams is retiring at the end of October. Desmond Wolfe and Wade Barrett are at under 40% morale too.

Jayzero beating Tarrynator at 2 Pretty 2 Bleed really was the beginning of the end for the Continental Coalition.

[Tiarnán]

I have some ball thing tomorrow night, so the write-up will probs pop up on Thursday.

I can confirm that the next PPV will be called [purple]Neon Night[/purple] though, and will feature a VERY SPECIAL MUSICAL GUEST.

[Burke]

No Fatties Allowed Episode 31!

[Tiarnán]

NO FATTIES ALLOWED --- Episode 31[/b]

In what can only be deemed a GROUNDBREAKING MOMENT in BP history, General Manager Sable kicked off what is sure to be a fabulous month with an utterly huge announcement:

"Beautiful Persons is truly reaching new heights. With every passing week we find ourselves gaining more and more momentum, and I don't think I'm being wrongly presumptuous when I say that the promotion will surely take its undisputed place at the top of the SPORTS ENTERTAINMENT ladder any day now.

Rest assured that our ascent has not gone unnoticed by those who truly matter most. The true beautiful people, if you will. Yes, the company is preparing to take its first step into the world of global celebrity. I can reveal right now that as of today, a worldwide SUPERSTAR has agreed to appear, host and perform at our up-and-coming Pay Per View, NEON NIGHT.

Now, the wiser of you will have picked up on the relevance of the event's title, as it is named after this superstar's most successful album! In fact, she has very kindly given us permission to use her NUMBER TWO UK SMASH HIT "I Begin to Wonder" as the PPV's theme music! Yes, that's right. At NEON NIGHT, we will be graced by a true Diva. A triple threat, she has starred in numerous television shows and stage productions, and holds the title of Most Number One (UK Club Chart) Hits in music history!

Ladies and gentlemen, I give you, THE QUEEN OF CLUBS...








MISS DANNII MINOGUE!

[Brandon]

I like the part in the video where the words are circling around her. That should be our pre-match graphic for Neon Night tbh.

[Burke]

Well, at least it's not Kylie.

[Tiarnán]

It's hard to follow the revelation that a global superstar will soon be in our midst, but the women of Beautiful Persons did their best when they took part in an elimination fatal four way for the company's Women's Championship. The competitors? Champion Tiffany, Angelina Love, Jazz and Jessica. Jessica, whilst proving very capable as an athlete and performer throughout her tenure in the company, has never quite been able to grab hold of the big one. This bout saw her attempt to break that run of bad luck. The fiery female gave it her best shot, and definitely started off on the right note. What do I mean? Well, Jessica managed to eliminate the champion Tiffany just one minute after the opening bell, capturing her in a swift backslide for the three count!

Naturally Tiffany wasn't happy. In a move that could only be described as HORRENDOUS AND UNACCEPTABLE, the now enraged Diva (in every sense of the word!) took one look at the referee, let out a ferocious ROAR and proceeded to boot him full-force in the groin. We at BeautifulPersons.com can confirm the rumour that the assault of the official was so violent that it caused him to draw blood by the pint. A relentless Tiffany had to be dragged out of the arena by a herd of men and women, whilst the referee was carried out by paramedics and replaced.

The match continued following this brief moment of confusion. Angelina was next to go, again falling victim to Jessica, who seemed to be on fire. This left the capacity crowd with just Jessica and Jazz, and the guarantee of a new champion by the match's end. Jessica's offense continued to come from all corners, but it became apparent that the red-head's energy was beginning to wane. No stranger to the game of wrestling, the veteran Jazz was quick to capitalize on this. As Jessica sprang herself off the top rope, aiming for some sort of springboard manoeuvre, she was caught in mid air by an absolutely BRUTAL lariat closeline from the beastly woman, causing the less experienced of the two to land on the mat with a dull ~thud~. Seemingly unconscious, Jessica was quickly taken advantage off by her opponent, who covered her and scored the three count. Thus, Jazz was able to add yet another title to her long list of accomplishments, whereas poor Jessica had yet again been foiled at the last minute.

Of course, the drama surrounding this match didn't quite end here. Cameras caught a teary Jessica walking gingerly backstage roughly half an hour later. Ignoring the pursuit of a perhaps insensitively eager A.J., Jessica seemed to be headed for the arena exit. However, she was stopped mid-track by Sable, who was wearing an expensive and revealing looking dress and a haughty smirk to match. Confronting the depressed diva, Sable announced smugly that she hasn't been pleased with Jessica's performance as a competitor on Beautiful Persons.

"Honey, following the acquisition of DANNII MINOGUE I think you can rest assured that here in Beautiful Persons we only expect the best from our stars. As Dannii herself would say, "Perfection (is) all that I want". And Jessica, you sure don't seem to be close to perfect. When we signed you for this role we'd been hearing good things about you. What happened to the girl who supposedly worked day in and day out, sometimes in the sleaziest places imaginable, in order to perfect her craft and push herself to the top of the independents? This is what it says on your record, and yet I fail to see that drive, I fail to see that determination, and most of all I fail to see that...spark. With that said, I think there's only one path we can go down from here, and it's not a very bright one. For you anyway...I imagine I'll quite enjoy it, as..."

At this point the General Manager was cut off by the woman she was addressing, who had wiped her tears away, a strong, determined expression of indigence combined with pride etched across her face. Sable didn't look too pleased at the interjection, but Jessica...well, she didn't care!

"No, I don't care, Sable, so you can lose that face 'honey'. Look, I work my butt off every night to give the audience the best performance I can. You wanna call my passion into question? Don't even think about it, you haggard old cunt. I KNOW that I can find my place at the top of the heap here. Has it happened yet? No. But the best things take time, and I assure you that I am the best. Sable, I'm asking you...NO, I'm DEMANDING that you give me Jazz at Neon Nights. Give me one more title match. If I lose again then I'll concede defeat and you can do what you want with my contract. Just give me the match. I swear to you, I will beat Jazz on that night, and I will begin my reign as one of the best champions the world of wrestling has ever seen. You quoted Dannii? Well Sable, I'm going to quote another international star that I think you may have heard of. As Robbie Williams would say...I've sure as hell got the gift, and I'm gonna stick it in the goal. It's going to happen, because I'm going to MAKE IT HAPPEN."

Sable didn't quite seem to know what to make of this. After a moment of silence, she agreed to Jessica's demand. With a cold nod (we think we saw a brief glimpse approval piercing that frozen face), she announced that at Neon Night, we will be seeing JESSICA vs. JAZZ in a career vs. title match.

[Tiarnán]

Sept 29, 2011 16:29:56 GMT -5 Burke said:

Well, at least it's not Kylie.

You should be so lucky.

(lucky lucky lucky)

[Tiarnán]

We established earlier that Tiffany...well, wasn't happy after losing her title at the beginning of the show. There is a moaning referee lying in pain in some hospital who we think can attest to that. The referee wasn't the only person to fall victim to the Terror of the Tiff. Our cameras followed a fuming Tiffany out to the arena parking lot, just in time to see her hurling an abundance of curse words that we'd rather not repeat at her partner and BFF Brandon. Thankfully Brandon won't be spending the week bloodied up in a hospital ward, but he certainly got an earful.

"HOW COULD THIS HAVE HAPPENED? I don't BELIEVE it! Why weren't you out there with me?! You could have DONE something. GOD, it's not like you actually have a MATCH tonight! There is no excuse! You are officially the WORST PARTNER IN CRIME EVER! Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaargh!!! I can't...I can't...I don't know how to...I can't...I CAN'T DEAL WITH THIS RIGHT NOW! Noooooooooooooooooooooooo!"

If it weren't for months and months of abuse, torment and just general evil, we may have felt bad for her. A devastated Tiffany broke down at this point, bursting into tears and falling forward. Thankfully, Brandon was there to catch her fall.

"No Tiffany! NO! You need to stop. We CAN'T let this get between us. We can't let THEM get between us. I know it seems like the worst thing in the world right now, and I know it seems like the easy option, but don't let your grief harm our bond. I've seen so many friendships fall apart, but it's always the absolute BEST ones that make it through even the hardest of times. Pacey and Joey...Jesse and James...Dannii and Kris. And you know what? We're better than ALL OF THEM. I love you so much!"

At this point Brandon too began to weep, and we here at BeautifulPersons.com felt our icy hearts begin to thaw. Taking hold of Tiffany's hands, Brandon looked into his friend's eyes, and began to speak:

"Tiffany, I've heard rumours. I've heard people talking. They want to bring us down. They want to rip the heart out of us. Yes, THEM. It's a conspiracy against us. I swear to you, I hear the voices. But the voices also tell me that there are bigger things planned for us. Things that are unimaginable. A new age is coming. An age of power. An age of US reigning supreme over those who are doing these utmost to keep us down. Just wait and see, Tiff. Wait and see. It's coming."

Following those words, the noises of the world seemed to fade momentarily. A northernly wind began to blow, as the full moon appeared from behind a solitary cloud. Things are changing at Beautiful Persons, and these two seem to be at the centre of it. Keep watch. It's coming.

[Tiarnán]

Whoops.

[Tiarnán]

Kylie is officially Doctor Kylie Minogue by the way.



I think she got some new extra large lips to celebrate the occasion.

[Brandon]

Oct 6, 2011 16:23:33 GMT -5 Tiarnán said:

Whoops.

I blame Burke for not scheduling his ~company in a more organized manner. He's worse than HHH.

[Tiarnán]

I did genuinely forget. And I still haven't finished that first write-up yet(!).

I think I'll shorten things down A LOT, because those two posts took it out of me.

[Tiarnán]

I don't think I'm going to be able to do this, so if someone else wants to take up my turn and get an extra long go or something then that'd be cool. Depending on how Burke wants to work it obviously. Sorry about that.