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Post by Burke on May 30, 2014 17:34:26 GMT -5
Saw a midget go into a store wearing a KKK outfit today and thought, “man, that’s a little racist.”
In the United States a man gets kicked in the groin every 6.2 seconds. I would hate to be that guy.
Lily Allen says she turned down a role in Game of Thrones because there was too much sex with her brother going on. Surely they could have stopped going at it for a few weeks while she went to film the show though.
A blonde calls up an airline ticket counter and asks, "How long are your flights from London to Glasgow?" The ticket clerk replies, "Just a minute, madam..." "Thank you." says the blonde and hangs up.
Yesterday I tried to carve the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles out of a big piece of wood with a knife. But I did it wrong and ended up with a load of Splinters instead.
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Post by Burke on Sept 19, 2014 16:45:16 GMT -5
Scotland can leave the United Kingdom simply by checking a box that says "Yes."
Meanwhile, I have to agree to 18 pages of terms and conditions to download iOS 8.
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Post by Tarry on Sept 19, 2014 17:21:33 GMT -5
Saw a midget go into a store wearing a KKK outfit today and thought, “man, that’s a little racist.” I thought this was the Random Bullshit thread and that you were telling us about your day for a second there.
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Post by Astrozombie on Sept 19, 2014 22:35:49 GMT -5
Saw a midget go into a store wearing a KKK outfit today and thought, “man, that’s a little racist.” I thought this was the Random Bullshit thread and that you were telling us about your day for a second there. I did too, I just assumed he was still in Florida.
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Post by Burke on Feb 26, 2015 14:04:59 GMT -5
This morning I went to a meeting for my premature ejaculator's support group.
But it turns out that it's tomorrow.
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Post by Tarry on Feb 26, 2015 16:37:23 GMT -5
This morning I went to a meeting for my premature ejaculator's support group. But it turns out that it's tomorrow. It happened again, I thought this was the Random Bullshit thread and that you were just over sharing.
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Post by Burke on Jun 17, 2015 13:24:57 GMT -5
Why did Jon Snow stand in line for 6 hours at the Apple Store? For the watch. Please, hold your applause.
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Post by Burke on Jul 29, 2015 15:11:24 GMT -5
How did Arnold Schwarzenegger reply when asked if he wanted to upgrade to Windows 10? I still love Vista, baby.
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Post by Burke on Sept 25, 2015 14:11:02 GMT -5
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Post by Burke on Jan 23, 2017 14:19:36 GMT -5
I forgot to do my yearly bump of this thread in 2016. Better late than never!
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Post by Jayzero on Jan 23, 2017 15:11:13 GMT -5
I'm going to fight you
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Post by Burke on Mar 23, 2017 15:32:02 GMT -5
My wife was dying.
I was by her bedside.
She said in a tired voice, "There's something I must confess."
"Shhh", I said, "Theres nothing to confess. Everything's alright."
"No, I must die in peace. I had sex with your brother, your best friend, his best friend and your father."
"I know", I whispered, "Thats why I poisoned you."
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Post by Jayzero on Mar 23, 2017 18:57:32 GMT -5
That was pretty dark, bro. You okay?
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Post by Burke on Mar 24, 2017 14:52:15 GMT -5
That was pretty dark, bro. You okay? Boy, that was sunshine and hugs compared to most of the other comedy shit I'm into.
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Post by Jayzero on Mar 24, 2017 15:01:31 GMT -5
That was pretty dark, bro. You okay? Boy, that was sunshine and hugs compared to most of the other comedy shit I'm into.
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